HUMOUR UNLEASHED -- 16
(Compiled by Subbaram Danda)
Watching a funny flick that produces giggles
is very good for the heart,a study has found.
At the same time, watching a horror film
causes mental stress resulting in the
narrowing of blood vessels, which
is not good for the heart.
The “talking” parrot
A college-going lad asked his parents to get him a pet. “Almost all my friends have a pet, either a dog or a cat. One has even a little turtle. I should have one,” he insisted. His father rejected the idea forthwith, as he hated animals. However, his mother appeared to appreciate his desire but kept quiet.
During the Christmas vacation, when the youngster went on an excursion with his friends, his mother broached the subject with her husband. “See, our Kris is a very diligent boy, studying well. He does not have any bad habits. All his activities are transparent. If we get him a pet, possibly a parrot, he will feel happy and it would also help him cut his addiction to television.” Reluctantly his father agreed.
Next day Kris mother went to a pet market. There parrots were priced in the range of Rs.500 to Rs.600. Only one bird had a quote of Rs.300. She asked the shop-keeper, pointing to the low-priced one, “Why this costs only Rs.300? It will speak all right, no?”
The shop-keeper: “Madam, all parrots are fine. They talk very well. The low-priced one has some history. It was previously in a bar and knows all the people by name who used to frequent it. That’s all.”
“How does it matter to me?” she thought, purchased the parrot and took it home. The bird greeted everyone coming home and the woman was very happy. Even her husband started liking the new entrant in the house.
When Kris returned from his vacation, his mother told him at the entrance, “I have a surprise for you. Come on in,” and took him to the room where the parrot had been kept in a beautiful cage.
As soon as they entered, they heard a sweet shrill voice, “Hi Kris! How are you? Where is your girl friend? I left the bar a fortnight ago.”
Kris mother swooned.
The wave
A young man, known for his cheerful attitude and ever-smiling looks, became depressed almost all of a sudden. A close friend met him at a beach and was surprised to see him distraught and in a pensive mood.
He asked him: “I have never seen you sitting alone and brooding over things like this. What is the matter?”
The young man: “I don’t like the wave of social activist Anna Hazare sweeping the country. I not only despise it but hate it.”
The friend: “What? You are the only person I have come across speaking against it. It has created a new awakening among our people. I personally feel that it is a welcome development.”
The young man: “But, it has played havoc with my marriage proposal.”
The friend: “Come on, be frank. What has happened?”
The young man: “My marriage was about to be finalized. But silently the bride’s party appears to have shelved the proposal.”
The friend: “Why? Be more specific.”
The young man: “The broker had told them that I work in a crucial department of the government and though my salary is not high, I have ‘other’ substantial income.”
Proud grandpa!
Grand-daughter: Grandpa, last week-end I and my parents went to the new theme park. It has several rides, games, kiosks and a roller-coaster. We loved it.
Grandpa: It is nothing, I have seen better things.
Grand-daughter after a week: Grandpa, a boy in my class does many wonderful things. He is first in studies and also in swimming, running, jumping and singing. He also knows magic.
Grandpa: It is nothing, I have done better things.
Grand-daughter after another week: Grandpa, yesterday the Governor came to our school, made a presentation and answered our questions very ably and humorously. We were so impressed that we gave him a standing ovation.
Grandpa: It is nothing, I have spoken better.
Grand-daughter after yet another week: Grandpa, I have become curious to know what all you have seen, done and spoken in the past. Tell me all.
Grandpa: My dear child, I have forgotten everything.
Grand-daughter: I am very proud of you, Grandpa!
October 8, 2011 (740 words)
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