HUMOUR UNLEASHED -- 24
(Compiled by Subbaram Danda)
The secret of humour is surprise -- Aristotle,
Greek philosopher and teacher of
Alexander the Great
The best password
One day, a man and his wife started quarrelling over a trivial matter. The man had forgotten to switch off the bathroom light as he came out of it and the woman would not forgive him for the lapse. An explanation given by him would not satisfy her.
She launched a tirade against him recounting his history of forgetfulness. He argued back but suddenly turned silent.
Watching all this was their ten year old son. He could not put up with his mother’s diatribe. He remarked: “This is too much, mom. You are making a mountain out of a molehill. Stop calling him names.”
Then he looked up to his father and asked: “Dad, you have always been assertive. But, why have you abruptly become mum now?”
The man replied: “You know, when your mom becomes wild with anger, she comes out with choicest expletives. Like a bolt from the blue I realized that her most abusive words could make excellent passwords for use on the computer. Of late, I have been running short of them. So without retorting I started listening to her carefully and remembering them. I am happy I have been able to collect five unique offensive words from her outburst. No one will use them as their passwords.”
Son: “Which is the best of the five?”
The man: “Maramanda (wooden brain). This is one of the epithets she used to describe me today.”
The elusive search
It was 8:00 p.m. A man rushed out of his house, stood on one side of the road and started looking at the sky. He would not shift his gaze. Five minutes passed.
A group of about ten persons gathered there and they too turned their heads towards the sky. They could not see anything. But they continued, like the man, to look in the same direction. A few more minutes went by.
By now about 50 persons assembled there and began watching the sky. Nothing could come to their view. A couple of more minutes ticked by.
The man stood there immersed in his scan of the firmament. A young boy approached him and asked, “What are you searching for?”
The man replied: “The moon.”
Unable to control his laughter, the boy said, “Don’t you know today is New Moon Day. There won’t be any moon in the sky.”
“Oh, yes, I totally forgot that. I am sorry. I am a fool.” he said. He hesitated for a moment and asked the boy, “But then, why these fifty guys are also looking at the sky?” Without waiting for a reply from him, he quietly got back into his house.
Give and take
It was the time, when the “Pleasure of Giving” week was being celebrated. In a school a teacher asked a student: “Have you ever experienced the joy associated with the policy of 'give and take?'”
The student: “No miss. But I would like to. You please give me and I will take it.”
The entire class burst into laughter. The clever teacher replied: “Sure, I will give you a blow. You take it and enjoy.” The laughter grew louder.
(550 words)
December 15, 2012
