HUMOUR UNLEASHED -- 28
(Compiled by Subbaram Danda)
.jpg)
Sometimes humour is like an exotic orchid flower.
It does not appeal to all !
Relatives
A man and his wife, who were known to cut jokes at the expense of each other at every available opportunity, were driving on a village road. When it took a turn they saw a flock of sheep moving ahead of them occupying almost the entire width of the road. He honked several times but they would not budge. The animals maintained their sluggish and languorous pace without leaving sufficient room for the car to overtake.
At this point, the husband looked at his wife and commented, “They appear to be like your relatives, slow and insensitive.”
“Yes, you are absolutely right,” the wife replied with a cool flourish. “They are behaving like my in-laws!”
Enticing exchange
A shop dealing in a variety of items came up in a busy locality. The owner had expected good business but as time passed he was frustrated. He could get only a few customers.
He approached a marketing guru and his advice was: “Modernize and decorate your shop pleasingly. Organize frequent sales fests and make enticing exchange offers. More important, your shop signs should attract womenfolk.”
Religiously, the owner beautified his show-room and put up a colourful board in front of his shop. It read: “NEW FOR OLD. We exchange anything and everything you have. Step in with your wife and step out with your selection fully satisfied. You have our guarantee.”
Oh My God!
A drunk staggered out of a bar and bumped into a decently-clad man on the street. Holding his arm, he blabbered, “I am God. I will grant you any wish. Tell me fast.” Flabbergasted, the man replied, “Friend, you are not God. Leave me alone.”
The drunk: “If anybody calls me God, will you get me a drink?”
Trying to wriggle out, the man replied, “Sure.”
The drunk dragged the man into the bar. Looking at him, the bartender exclaimed in high pitch, “Oh, my God…. You are back again!” The startled man shouted an order immediately, “One Scotch,” threw a note on the table and ran out.
February 15, 2014
