OH! DEMONETISATION !!

It had all the trappings of a surgical strike – secrecy, surprise and swiftness.  Prime Minister Narendra Modi’s November 8, 2016 attack on black money hoarders, terror operatives and fake currency churners through demonetisation of Rs.1,000 and Rs.500 currency notes and introduction of new Rs.2,000 notes was undoubtedly a well-orchestrated manoeuvre. 

 

It is not my intention here to go into the merits or demerits of the move. Instead, I want to capture the “fascinating” ripples it has generated. Newspapers, magazines and television channels have been flush with interesting stories.  There has been a flurry of activity in the social media like the Face Book, Twitter and WhatsApp.  The result is a treasure trove of humorous skits, awesome photos, uproarious trolls, thought-provoking cartoons, fact packs, ingenious comments and poetic interludes. 

  

It is my pleasure to present here some such “never to forget” pieces of intellectual flourish.  Who said our people are not thoughtful?

SCENES, SOUNDS AND SCENTS

(A compilation by Subbaram Danda)

The determined warrior

The Prime Minister hit the cover page of the popular Tamil weekly “Kumudam” in a rare style.  He was featured sporting the full battle armour.  It was a rehash of the picture of Bahubali, the principal character in the blockbuster movie of the same name.  The word Bahubali running across the photo was modified to read Black-bali, conveying in unequivocal terms that he is all set to inflict a deadly blow on black money. 

Bouquets

News channels repeatedly telecast a scene in a busy branch of the State Bank of India, where an out-of-the-way human emotion was at play.   An elderly woman was seen presenting flowers to staffers there in appreciation of their commendable work under great stress.  They were pleasantly surprised.   

The workload  of the bank staff also became the subject of a meme.  

Trolls

Historical anecdotes came in handy for people to look at the new situation.

Marie Antoinette was the queen of France at the outbreak of the French Revolution more than two centuries ago.  Her extravagant lifestyle had made her very unpopular with the French citizens.  Her infamous poser to starving revolutionaries was: “If you don’t have bread, eat cakes.”

In an imitation, Modi was presented in a meme as advising people: "If you don't have paper, use plastic."  (The reference is to his suggestion that people should increasingly go in for electronic payment options like credit cards.)

Tell-tale photos

The social media was full of photos that reflected the trend of the day in more ways than one. Here are a few of them.

The first child has no demonetised currencies - so looks cheerful.
The second knows not how to exchange - so looks moody.
The third has converted his old notes - so is all smiles.

In step with times:  "We welcome your presentations.
We have swipe machines." 

The magnitude

The fight against black money has unfolded mind-blowing statistics about currency notes. India is the largest producer and consumer of currency notes in the world after China.  According to reports, more than 9,000 crore notes of all denominations have been in circulation.   Of these 2,300 crore notes represent the scrapped denominations of Rs.500 and Rs.1,000.

Visualise this scenario:  A pile of the 2,300 crore demonetized notes stacked one on top of the other would rise to a height 300 times that of Mount Everest, the highest peak in the world.  If laid as a pathway to the moon, it would be long enough to enable a man to go to the moon and come back five times.

What will the Reserve Bank of India do with the huge stock of the unwanted notes?  They will be shredded into tiny pieces in powerful machines, compressed and converted into briquettes.  These will be sold to industries for use in furnaces as fuel.  They also serve as landfills.  Further, the shredded material can be made into pulp and used to make boards, pads, files and calendars.  

In the past

The first demonetisation of independent India took place in 1978, when Morarji Desai was the Prime Minister.  Currency notes of the denomination of Rs.1,000, Rs.5,000 and Rs.10,000 were declared invalid.  At that time they were really of high value.  

In lighter vein

The long queues witnessed in front of banks for deposit of the banned notes or their exchange for legal tender provided fuel for thought for comic writers.   Here are some of the several jokes that went viral on WhatsApp:

Joke 1

Two friends met after a very long time.  They exchanged pleasantries and started discussing their family matters.

Friend 1:  So, how many children have you?  They should be well grown up now, no?

Friend 2:  Sure, I have three children, all sons aged 26, 23, and 20.

Friend 1: What are they doing now?

Friend 2: The first is married.  He and my daughter-in-law are in Canara Bank, the second son is in Central Bank and the third one in Indian Bank.

Friend 1: Oh, that is wonderful.  All are employed in the banking sector! 

Friend 2: No, no, they are all now standing in a queue to convert demonetized currencies into legal tender.

Joke 2

A suggestion: Before visiting the bank to exchange your old Rs.1,000 and Rs.500 notes, please don’t forget to carry the following:

1. Your ID proof, 2. Lunch box, 3. Playing cards, 4. Dinner packet, 5. Bed sheet, 6. Pillow, 7. Blanket, 8. Mobile power bank, 9. Drinking water and 10. Lots of patience.

Joke 3

The situation one day after demonetisation:

ATMs – out of service

Banks – out of cash

People – out of control

Modi – out of India (shortly after demonetization announcement Modi went to Japan on a pre-scheduled official tour)

Joke 4

An unsolicited advice: You can take your old notes to public sector banks, private ones or the banks of the Ganga, the Yamuna, the Narmada, the Godavari or the Cauvery.  Your decision should be based on the colour of your money.

Joke 5

Husband: Why is Pulav tasting somewhat different today?

Wife: I have no small currency to buy Lavang, Pudina and salt from the local shop.  So I added a small quantity of the Pathanjali tooth paste, which has all these three ingredients!

Joke 6

“My wife is treating me like the new Rs.2,000 currency note”.

“Lucky guy.  She adores you.”

“Oh no, she feels that like the high-denomination note she cannot change me, nor can she get rid of me.”

Joke 7

A tongue-in-cheek reminder to citizens of India:  If you send your pants and shirts to laundry without taking out any currency in the pockets, you may be charged with money laundering, a serious offence under the regulations.



Joke 8

Banks have a new task on hand.  Pressure is mounting on them to be KYE-compliant (Know your employee) rather than KYC (Know your customer).  This is in view of the numerous note-conversion scams involving their employees.  

Cartoons

There have been a variety of cartoons in the media.  Here is a sample.

The fallout

The demonetisation step saw strange developments.

A man living on the outskirts of New Delhi went to his bank to withdraw Rs.20,000 from his savings account, but the bank had run short of notes.  He agreed to receive Rs.10-coins instead.  He collected 2,000 coins in a sack and carried the heavy bag all the way back home.  It weighed 16 kg.

A gang of burglars broke into a bank in Uttar Pradesh in the night.  They could not locate any currency that was legal tender.  There were only bundles and bundles of demonetized notes. There were, however, Rs.10-coins neatly packed in plastic bags. They were clever. They executed the robbery in a smart fashion.  They carried away only the coins worth Rs.1 lakh. The Police wondered how they could have transported the heavy booty.

A young man, employed as a computer engineer, stood in a queue to exchange his old currency for new.  The line was very long and to kill the time he struck a conversation with a lass, who was also in the line.   They were not successful in converting their money that day.  They came again the next morning.  Their friendship took an intimate turn, as cupid showered his arrows on them.  They decided to marry -- but only after the demonetization fever subsided. 

In Kerala, official information shows that liquor sales did dip after demonetisation, but bounced back within three to four days. 

Comments

The reactions were winsome.  Not only were they outright critical or stubbornly supportive but also sarcastically rhetoric or patently witty.  Here are some:

Former Prime Minister Manmohan Singh: “It is monumental mismanagement...organized loot and legalized plunder.”

Congress Vice-President Rahul Gandhi: "It is Modi-made disaster."

Finance Minister Arun Jaitley: “It is a courageous step...  Parties, who were once a part of every scandal in the country, are now opposing demonetisation.”

A former Union Finance Minister:  “It is demonisation, not demonetisation.”

A famous cricketer:  “I don’t have to go to a bank.  I have piled up many 100s.”

An edit-page piece in the “Times of India”: “The PM’s surgical strike…might whiten the economy; for now it has only blackened our mood.”

A “status” on FaceBook: “Amazed at the lies being spread, I went to my bank. No crowd, no jostling, no stampede, no lost tempers, no police and no cash.”

A caption to a photo in a write-up of newspaper columnist Shobhaa De: "After standing for hours in ATM queues, the aam aadmi (common man) is now being told to stand up and take a patriotism test in cinema halls."  (This is in the context of the Supreme Court's directive to cinema halls to play the national anthem before screening a movie.)

Poetic outbreak

A video clip has emerged on You Tube that goes lyrical about the old 500-rupee note.  Titled “An Ode to 500 Note,” the short flick features a young woman singing tunefully, “Here is an ode to my old 500 note that bought me many things I like to sing about……”  It is indeed an imaginative creation.

And we can expect more of these in the days and months to come!

November 28, 2016